sat down on the pot for a crap. Read a bit of my pulp fiction, wiped my arse, then, I stooped to pull my trousers up and stood to hitch them up and then I got this big head rush. BIG fuckin' head rush. I grabbed the towel thingie there, that is bolted to the wall, there. I was hangin' onto it and havin' this big BIG fuckin' headrush, see? I thought, "Whoa, this is gnarly, am I gonna die?" Next thing I know, I am feelin funny and I don't quite know where I am and things are all PINK, yeah, pink. I blink and think "Maybe I should look another direction, so I go to turn my head, to see if I can see any other colours. I groaned realizing I was laying in a puddle of blood, on the floor of the shithouse. "Whoa," I think to meself, "I been laying there for a long time and I bled a LOT and it is been gettin' clotted there and looks like a pink and red fried egg." There, is a dark red yoke, with brainy looking texture and around it, the pale stuff, kinda a see-through pink. Like a pink and red easy-over fried egg. "My own blood," I think, "Whoa, wonder what I cut... So I feel my face and my nose is on crooked. And I think, "Whoa, I busted my nose (again)." [I got my nose busted in back in '70] "I musta passed out," I think and I stand up carefully and I am turnin' to look at the mirror and, as I am turnin, I see the towel rack I was hangin' onto as I was thinkin' maybe I was gonna die... and I see there, on the towel rack a little hank of skin and right next to it, on the wall there is a funny looking blood stain (it is a nose print, I think). "Hmmmm. Seems, on the way down, I smashed my face in on that towel hangin' towel rack thingie," I think as I hoist myself past it and turn to look in the mirror and and and Gulp The horror. I smashed my nose way over so it looks like the letter C. "Whoa," I think and I climb into the shower and sit there, in the bottom of the shower for two hours or so, under cool, just below luke-warm water and I hallucinate vividly or maybe I dream, not sure. I busted my fuckin' face and I am in the shower there trying to negotiate with myself, thinkin stuff like, "I am 45 now, fuck, eh?" and "I remember the days when getting a head-rush was fun," and "This thing is bent bad, whoa... fuck." I climbe outta the shower, driy meself carefully and lay down in bed and sleep for eighteen hours. Ever since 1970, I haven't been able to breathe through one of my nostrils, the one on the right. Now, my nose is bent way over in the middle, high one way the curving ober to the other, like a C well really, more like a ( Yeah, that's right. And I can breath out of both of my nostrils for the first time in 35 years.
Yupp... got a fine story to tell too: A day before yesterday I logged off WBFH, launched Kazaa, turned the telly on and went for a nap. The weather was terrible, hot and humid so it seemed the best to take a short nap till it gets cooler. I woke up in total darkness. Looked at my watch- 4:00... mhmm i couldn't sleep for 14hours straight (I usually sleep less than 5-6hours a day 7 is absolute maximum), something is fucked up I thought... then a lightning struck in house... I went blind... than realized that it is only 1,5hours since i gone asleep... the power is off I thought... good at least PC and Telly won't get hurt I thought as i rushed upstairs to the attic to check if the roof is still in place (the wind was blowing like mad too and the lightning struck the house so there was a small possibility of fire developing somewhere inside the usuall attic-rubbish). The house was still standing and intact (which was not true about 2 of neighbours homes) so I went back to my room... and there was this strange smell... smell that homegrown overclockers all know too well... silicon chips that took too much... after the power was restored I immediately opened the case to take a closer look... static discharge made me fly some 2 meters b4 I landed. Goodbye telly, Mo-Bo, CPU, GFX-card, RAM-chips, LAN adapter, Soundcard Good morning painy ass... as I hit the chair with it during the last stage of my flight after the 1st attempt to open the case.
