I got this fuckin' hang-nail. Oops: Um, I mean, I HAD this fuckin' hang-nail. Grew out the side of my little pinky-toe. Grew inward, between my little pinky-toe and the next toe. I got no medical insurance. Even worse, I got a job where if I can't walk, I can't work. I decided I was gonna fix the thing. Jesus christ it hurt man. Every step I took was another footstep-of-hell. I decided I was gonna fix the thing (Oh, I already said that...). A couple months ago, after reading the famous internet legend entitled, "How I circumcized myself," I thought, "Fuck, if that guy could do that to his own cock, I could definitely do that to my little pinky-toe." I began with some nice gauze bandages, in order to not bind up any wound, but in order to isolate the toe from it's neighbours, the other toes. And I got one of those real fuckin' sharp scalpel like knives hobbiests use... you know the ones? Ya can slice through anything when the thing is new. I wasn't planning on making the thing not new. Dull blades were not in the plan. And I got some acetone for to dry the skin. I heard somewhere that acetone is great for drying out skin. A couple months ago, I began to do the following; I would have a nice long bath. Then, when all the calloused skin on my feet was all, well, you know, the way foot skin gets after a long bath? Well, I would look for the raised painful skin all around the hang-nail on the little pinky toe and I would begin to cut. I only cut what looked like the outer dermis, this way I had less fear of infection, seeing as you can get infected much easier in a wound than you can from, well, something that only scratched the surface.... Then I would, using the gauze, make a little braided thingie and place it between the little pinky-toe and it's neighbours and then I would brush on some acetone and wait for the acetone to dry and then I would brush on some more and wait and cetera. This would make the new skin around the non-wound get dry fast, leaching the water from it (I hoped). Each time I had a bath, I would do this, being very careful to cut no deeper with my scalpel than I dared. The other day, I took the scalpel and I decided, "What the hell, let's go for it!" And I carefully lifted the little brown remnant of a nail and I began to cut around it. "No blood! Cool" I thought as I dug even further. Once I got to the part of the thing where it seemed to be growing from, I changed the direction my cutting was going and started cutting around and over the little brown remnant of nail from the quick (I think it is called a quick). Lo and behold, soon, all I had there was a little brown remnant of a toenail and the flesh it seemed to be sticking out of. Carefully, I grabbed it and gave a tug. It hurt like hell. So, I looked at it for a bit and then went and got a pair of needle-nose pliers. I looked at it some more and then told it I was gonna count to three. I counted one......... two..... and then I yanked it and it came out with a little twisted thing attached to it, that looked like I figure a nail looks like at it's root. No blood. Great pain. After about ten seconds, no pain. I wiggled the toe, still no pain. I put on the gauze and then a sock and walked. No pain. So I put on my boots and went for a walk. NO PAIN! First steps I took in over a year where there was no pain!!!!! It has been a couple days now. No pus, no swelling, no infection and no pain. Fuck I am so happy. People must be thinkin funny things when they see me boogying in my gum-boots! I am happy as a clam. Nevermind.
Don't you guys have free healthcare up there? Folks here are always using Canada as an example of how our system should be.
Hmmm, brings back memories of the time I had a wart on my foot (I was 11 or so at the time) and didn't feel like going to the doc AGAIN. I took my (t)rusty old "Victorinox" swiss-army knife and cut the bloody thing out myself. No hurt, but LOTS of the red stuff....
In saturday was the World day of Theater so we did a 24-hour theater marathon. In one of the plays we almost got to a murder, the most chilling experience ive had on that stage. Afterwards there was a fierce discussion with the audience whether the artist has the right "to cross the limit" that humanism puts to every conscience. Also on the other hand - is it a great artistic achievement to free yourself of all your inner barriers stopping you from doing the real thing, or the opposite - it is "the easy thing" to let your inner dark side overcome your social responsibility? Anyway, in another play some 10 hours later... oops class starts - ill finish later
...so apparently our choreorgapher (that hot babe vilglm liked - check the photoglimpses thread for pics), who acts in that play, decided to show in practice how one breaks his barriers. In her monologue she remembers of pulling a very heavy cart and the stabbing of her master, and the master`s boy trying to help her in the mud, and her tears for the boy`s emphaty, and later the races with the boy on her back, and she giving her most to win the race, and the triumph of victory and the boy`s bliss... So just before that part she went to one guy in the audience and said: - See this little wound on my foot? [we play with bare feet] - it opened just awhile ago. - Kiss it. The guy kisses it. - Thank you! Now, please, lick it. The guy wonders for a moment and then licks it. - Thank you! ...Now, please... stick your nails in it. The guy doesnt have long nails. - You dont have nails?! Do you have a knife? Or a needle? Who has a needle? Or nails? Or knife, shaving knife, anyone? Complete silence around the space. Those of us who know her all think the same - "God, she`s again in one of those affectations of hers!" One guy says - yes, I have a silver needle. She goes to him and lifts her leg. - Kiss my little wound. - Now, lick it. - Thank you. Now push the needle in it. The space is in complete silence - the one you`d get if you slap them with wet duster through the face. "FUCK, what is she DOING!?" becomes almost material. So tense you`ve got the feeling a flash may propagate through the people. - Push it deep, MAN! Everything else is unserious! - Hhhht... ok. thanks. She returned to the center of the stage - with almost unnoticable limp - And then she made the most amazing monologue ive ever seen in that play! Without speaking words! Only with the movement of her body! It was so full and whole... pierced by the emotion... and we were so well prepared and opened, with the adrenalin in our brains... It was magic.
Hmmmm If only I were young again My understanding so far is that she's an interesting woman, for sure, but her dark and unconventional personality will be the downfall of many a man! "What a head trip!"
Free healthcare? You jest, right? Only people get free health care are commies and we ain't commies. It costs money to get health care insurance in Canada. If you can't pay you get sick. If you are so sick you can't work, then you can't get into a hospital until you declare yerself destitute, then the state comes to yer rescue and assists you in auctioning off all yer property. Once all yer property is gone, you can pay yer medical bills. Once you can't afford to eat, or rent a home or pay yer medical bills, THEN, and ONLY then, will you get "free" medical care.... Having the state "provide care" for you HERE is like communism ANYWHERE, it is unpleasant AND you don't got ANY privacy. Nevermind.
