New, new joke thread :)

After my flatmate read this, you could have asked her: Why the long face?

 

why afi doesn't ski?

 

ehh?

There's 2 muffins in an oven.
One muffin says to the other, "Hey, it's really hot in here."
The other muffin says, "AHH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

Why wouldn't JFK be a very good boxer?
He can't take a shot to the head.

Why can't Jesus rollerskate?
Because he's nailed to a fucking tree.

 

OOOH i got another.


What's funnier than a dead pope?
A dead pope in a clown outfit.

 

What d'ya call a handsome Pakistani ?





Azif

 

Why do Pakistani women have a red dot on their foreheads?









Makes it easier to aim.

 

This one is fucking great

 

do they?


__
eh i guess i should produce some joke too.. instead of just pointing out your stupidity..

 

channel 100 discussion:
shot down pilot: " man, i was AFK!"
reply: "yeah, me too"

 

I thought they had that so you could scratch it..... and maybe win a car or a TV

 

LOL Hel...
You're ignorant as AFI is...
the main reason for Pakistani-India division was the relligion
That are the Hindu, not the friggin muslims that paint their wives with "one scratch and you'll get a billion bucks" marks...
but You obviously can't get it...

(sorry Kutya for makin' the obvious even more obvious, but those Ame-bushians and Aussies still didn;t got it.... so forgive me as a member of a civilized society please)

 

Reminds me when someone asks another pilot to bail his damaged plane and me budging in ch100 and saying stuff like: 'No way man, earn your kill!' or 'Fuck you I'm not jumping!'. Always gets the other guy killed...

*chuckle*

 

i've thought of that myself, nice one )

 

LOL

 

Gee, thanks for the info frog.... now i dont have to walk the streets hoping to be the next winner

 

lol

<Z>

 

ok, some more a/c jokes

---------------------

The Herc and the F-15s
A couple of F-15's are escorting a C-130 Hercules, and their pilots are chatting with the pilot of the transport to pass the time. Talk comes ?round to the relative merits of their respective aircraft. Of course the fighter pilots contend that their airplanes were better because of their superior speed, maneuverability, weaponry, and so forth, while the putting down the Herc?s deficiencies in these areas.
After taking this for a while, the C-130 pilot says, "Oh yeah? Well, I can do a few things in this old girl that you'd only dream about." Naturally, the fighter jocks challenge him to demonstrate.
"Just watch," comes the quick retort.
And so they watch. But all they see is that C-130 continuing to fly straight and level..
After several minutes the Herc pilot comes back on the air, saying "There! How was that?"
Not having seen anything, the fighter pilots reply, "What are you talking about? What did you do?"
And the Herc pilot replies, "Well, I got up, stretched my legs, got a cup of coffee, then went back an took a leak."

there's an optional version with b52 instead of c130 and the last reply is:
"well, i've just shut down 2 engines"

---------------------

There's a story about the military pilot calling for a priority landing because his single-engine jet fighter was running "a bit peaked." ATC told the fighter jock that he was number two behind a B-52 that had one engine shut down. Ah," the pilot remarked," the dreaded seven-engine approach."

------------------

The progress of the student during flying training was not good enough to allow him to continue the course and to become a fighter pilot. He had to leave the pilot training outfit but he wanted to remain in the Air Force and could be transferred into another sector. Asked for his preferences he replied:
" AAA, Anti Aircraft Artillery, because 'if I don't fly - nobody will"

----------------

ght crew with wing commander as A/C loads up. As he is strapping in, the nav notes that commander has his sidearm sitting on the dash. The nav asks "sir, why do you have your weapon out?"
commander replies 'I use that to shoot navs who get me lost"
nav pulls out his sidearm and sets it on his table. commander sees this and asks him why he has his weapon out
nav: "Sir, with all due respect, I'll know we're lost before you will"

---------------------

An instructor pilot in Pensacola takes his student out to the alert area for a flight. All pilots in the alert area share a common freq for deconfliction. The student after completion of a maneuver was supposed to set 10 inches of manifold pressure. He does not...
The instructor (after accidently pushing the transmit switch up which transmits to everyone on the UHF frequency instead of down which transmits to just the other cockpit):
"Ten inches, damn it. I told you to set ten inches!"
Another Instructor (deciding to let the first instructor know that he making an a$$ of himself on the radio):
"Hey, Ten inches! Your broadcasting."
A Third Instructor (two seconds later):
"Hell, if I had ten inches...I'd be braodcasting too!"

 

similar thingie here :]

http://www.billetjohn.com

 

I have this same joke, so read it again and there ya go.

 

Hèhè

<Z>