Artur Boruc the Great!

Discussion in 'Warbirds Polish' started by Glas, Jan 18, 2006.

  1. Glas

    Glas Well-Known Member

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    In the same theme as the Chuck Norris one;

    1. Artur Boruc holds the world record for eating Rangers supporters

    2. His stubble is made from titanium and he shaves it with a samurai

    3. He was the first Pole on the moon. He jumped there.

    4. Artur broke the world high jump record at school. He was 8 years old

    5. Artur doesn't get wet when he takes a bath. The water gets Artur

    6. Artur Boruc was elected as pope - he turned the appointment down

    7. Every year on his birthday, Artur throws one lucky boy into the sun

    8. Artur Boruc's hands are bigger than shaquille o'neal's feet

    9. Artur Boruc is immune to bird flu and has offered his sperm as an antidote

    10. Onions do not make Artur Boruc cry. Onions burst in to tears at the sight of him!

    11. Superman is allergic to kryptonite. Kryptonite is allergic to Artur Boruc

    12. Superman owns a pair of Artur Boruc pyjamas.

    13. Artur's mother gave birth to baby artur whilst running the marathon for Poland in the 1984 olympic games. She finished 2nd. Artur beat her by 6 minutes.

    14. Artur Boruc has slept with everybody's girlfriend/wife/daughter.

    15. When Artur was born, he immediately had sex with the surgeon who delivered him. She was the 11th woman Artur has slept with up to that point. He then completed the aforementioned marathon.

    16. Artur Boruc discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which artur is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, artur roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking

    17. Artur Boruc and God have never been seen in the same room at the same time

    18. Artur Boruc once had a shit in the Australian desert - we now call it Ayer's Rock

    19. A dinosaur once farted in Artur's presence. None survived.

    20. When Artur goes to the cinema, everybody else watches him.

    :D :D
     
  2. Holmes

    Holmes Well-Known Member

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    :))) :)))
     
  3. Snakeye

    Snakeye Well-Known Member

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    seems you like him up there ;)
     
  4. -frog-

    -frog- Well-Known Member

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    Good one...
    one mistake though- Poland did not participate in 1984 Olympics :(
     
  5. vojtas

    vojtas Well-Known Member

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    rotflmao ! :D
     
  6. --vipe

    --vipe Well-Known Member

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    yeah we have the greater goalkeepers in the world :)
     
  7. spuint

    spuint Well-Known Member

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    lmao glas!
    too bad hes not gonna play for NT :D
     
  8. Ziomek

    Ziomek Well-Known Member

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    Oh ye of small faith Glas , praise the Polish goalkeepers because they are the best in the world ;) , Dudek , Boruc , Kuszczak soon :D
     
  9. Glas

    Glas Well-Known Member

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    That would be a bit of an understatement mate ;)

    Guy is a hero and is already being hailed as one of our greatest all time goalkeepers. To understand though, Celtic have had a history of really dodgy goalkeepers. Then big Artur comes along...;)
     
  10. Glas

    Glas Well-Known Member

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    Hehe 19 and 20 were my contributions to it :D
     
  11. Glas

    Glas Well-Known Member

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    :confused:

    The post above was by the Celtic fans mate, and it is mighty praise indeed ;)

    Of all the players we have signed so far this year (and there has been alot, 10 or so so far and more to come in) Boruc has been accepted as the best of them. Him and Nakamura actually to be fair. But because we have always had shitty goalkeepers, everyone is hailing Boruc as the best :D

    There is also the fact he goes completely mental and taunts the opposition fans behind his goal when Celtic score :D :D He has got intae a wee bit of trouble for it, but the Celtic fans love it.
     
  12. Ziomek

    Ziomek Well-Known Member

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    Can you quote some of his taunts? :D mb some "kurwa`s" or " spierdalac`s" :D :D
     
  13. Ziomek

    Ziomek Well-Known Member

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    aaahhh yyeeesssssss celtic won 1-0 with rangers , hail boruc and zurawski (he scored the 1 goal)
    go go bhoys ! :cool:
     
  14. spuint

    spuint Well-Known Member

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    boruc kinda sucked.. :D but in the end two great saves, securing the win, so yeah, hail hail :)
     
  15. Ziomek

    Ziomek Well-Known Member

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    *slaps spuint in the arse*

    :rolleyes:
     
  16. Ziomek

    Ziomek Well-Known Member

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    Nad grodem we Wronkach słońce nieśmiało przebiło się przez chmury a ciepłe żółtawe promienie wpadły do komnaty księcia Janasa.
    -A jak tam na derbach Szkockich nasze wypadli?Słychać już co sługo?-rzekł książę z błogiego letargu błazna wytrącając
    -A jakże panie...,juści ci miałem prawić jeno mnie ze łba wyleciało-otrząsnął się trefniś Klejdinst
    -Toć dwa najstarsze klany dzisiaj się starły w tej krainie...
    -Dziwna ci to kraina panie oj dziwna ..gdzie chłopy w spódnicach chadzają a i kaszanka kaszanką nie jest tylko Hagisem jakowymś-rozgadał się trefniś
    -Do rzeczy mi tu relacyję z derbów zdawaj i oczu mi nie mydlij Hagisami i kaszankami-rozeźlił się książe
    -Pan Żurawski na wagę zwycięstwa trafienie uzyskał a i pan Boruc parady ze trzy urody niezwykłej wykonał
    -Kontent z takowych wieści jestem strasznie bo dobrym to dla nas że oba w chwałę tam urośli i ogranie na turniej krzyżacki zdobywają-uśmiechnął się pod nosem książe
    .....a wiatr wiał i wiał ponownie niebo chmurami zasnuwając.
    OBY NA MUNDIAL Z DYSPOZYCYJI NIE WYPADL BO MIAST MAGIC TO TRAGIC BEDZIE.....

    :mafia:
     
  17. -frog-

    -frog- Well-Known Member

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    Ino ja nie kontent, że się z kopania kiszki powietrzem napełnionej, motłochowi miejskiemu za sport ludowy uznanego taki rwtes i galimatias się czyni.
    Tożto wiele w Kaczypospolitej uciech przystępnych obecnie dla gawiedzi postronnej w mieście papieskim Turynie wielmożni steroidami napakowani zimowi gimnastycy, tudzież inni linoskoczkowie dla niepoznaki bobsleistami z Jamajki lubo też narciarzami z Etiopii zwani, jest.
    Wartko tylko kule magiczne, przez magików z SONY do kraju przywiedzione, zapuśćcie a na własne oczy znać wam będzię, że to przedni jest "entertainment". Kopanie zaś kiszek pustych, tudzież takowych łapanie, pustym jako i one pozostawcie. Pocznijcie zatem w izbach przede kulami a nijak się ichnych hangielskich zwyczajów i mód nie próbujcie.

    Free Style ((C)2006 by żaba) ;)
     
  18. spuint

    spuint Well-Known Member

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    ta.. wolali tragic, i sobie wywolali
    tylko ze dla nich tragic :D
     
  19. beryl

    beryl Well-Known Member

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    podziel sie tym co palisz :D :D
     
  20. Glas

    Glas Well-Known Member

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