Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by screw-, Jun 19, 2000.

  1. screw-

    screw- Well-Known Member

    Jan 24, 2000
    Moscow, Russia
    From : Funny Guy (), Tue Jun 13 2000 19:30
    ─────────────────────────&#947 2;─────────────────────────&#9 472;─────────────────────────& #9472;
    Since folks seem inclined to rag on Microsoft, I compiled a quick digest.
    These are jokes which are funny, but which didn't really warrant posting
    separately. I post such a digest whenever I have enough entries to warrant
    it. Particularly selective readers will probably not enjoy the digests, and
    may want to killfile RHF jokes with "Digest" in the title - ed.

    = = = = = = =
    >From: (George Basar)
    >Subject: RHF Submission: If a tree falls in the forest...

    Today in USA Today, experts were quoted as saying that the breakup of
    Microsoft would result in shoddy products and missed deadlines...

    And Microsoft is worrying about being able to do business as usual.

    = = = = = = =
    >From: (Ben Buxton)
    >Subject: the new microsoft companies

    The justice department has released it's recommendations on
    names for the two parts of Microsoft, post split:

    MICROS~1 and MICROS~2

    = = = = = = =
    >From: (Bob Kaplow)
    >Organization: DECUServe, where DECUS meets daily!
    >Subject: Quote of the day

    Quote of the day by Doug Steinfeld:

    "I think we should partition Microsoft into an OS company (called "C:") and

    an apps company ("D:"). Then we should blow away both partitions...."

    = = = = = = =
    >Subject: Defective, vague, and ambiguous

    Microsoft has argued in court that the US government's plan to break up the
    company is "defective in numerous respects, making the document vague and

    In which respect it's much like Microsoft's documentation.

    = = = = = = =
    >From: (Ewan McPhail)
    >Subject: Do you have an alibi?

    An explosive device of some kind detonated at the Microsoft South Africa
    offices in Johannesburg early this morning. Nobody was hurt and no data was
    lost. Police however estimate that it will take around 15 years to interview
    all the suspects.

    Source : Linda Algie, a co-worker with snappy come-back lines :)

    URL Link :

    = = = = = = =
    >From: (Erez Zadok)
    >Subject: Microsoft DIV 2

    Immediately after the announcement by Judge Penfield of splitting the
    company in two, Microsoft sued Micro.Com Specialists, LLC, and Software
    Research, Inc. (owners of for infringement of copyrights and

    Selected by Jim Griffith. MAIL your joke to
    If you post instead of mailing, it screws up the reply-address sometimes.
    Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. A Daemon will auto-reply.

    This joke's link:

    Flies high it dies, low and slow it'll go.
    screw@Los Partisanos de Cuba